Time for transition?

I took a long nap today and experienced a profound, recurring dream: that I was a pregnant.  Now stop right there.  I am NOT pregnant, nor plan to be, but this is the 3rd pregnancy dream I’ve had in the past couple months.  Sure I’ve had pregnancy dreams in the past, but the frightened kind where I would awake with a sense of relief that it was just that, a dream.  So these new dreams puzzled me as they’ve been happy, joyous dreams, though I still awake with certainty that that I don’t want children.  David too has been giving me that raised-eyebrow look as if to say, “is there something you want to tell me?  Has something changed?”

In the past two dreams I had, I was in the pregnancy phase, 2nd or 3rd trimester, but the dream I had today involved delivering two children, by myself and it was an easy passage.  No pain, no hardship…a very peaceful and happy transition.  So when I woke this time, I decided I needed to look this up.  What I found was very powerful and made perfect sense.

According to dream analysis I found on many sites, pregnancy dreams signify not the birth of a human, but the gestation of ideas and the birth of a life changing event. 

As possible as a pregnancy prophecy may be, usually the meaning of these dreams is not found in a literal event. This should not however, lessen the impact or meaning of the dream as pregnancy dreams are extremely potent. They are telling us that something important is coming; something life-altering is forming in our being. When we think of pregnancy in symbolic terms the dream is much easier to decipher.

If you are close to delivery, this usually means that something you’ve been planning or thinking about is close to materializing in the waking world.  If you are giving birth…it could mean that there is something you want to bring into the world which will be as life changing as giving birth. Whatever it is, the good news is that it is a natural event, something spontaneous and filled with life.
Look at your life and see if there is something that needs some nurturing, some part of yourself that means a lot to you, but you haven’t been taking care of–a project, a relationship, anything. Ask yourself why this isn’t being addressed, ask yourself what is more important tha[n] your own creation.

Pregnancy dreams, like real life pregnancies are harbingers of change, creativity, and new life being brought into the world. Treat your life as you would treat yourself if you were pregnant and wait for the miracle you’re already creating to manifest in your waking world!

http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art18080.asp

As many of you know, I’m on a journey to simplify my life and my current situation is anything but.  I’m always in an airport, then in a car, jumping between store locations, working 12-16 hour days and staying at my hotel long enough to sleep and do it all over again.  This has been the picture of my entire summer and I feel like I”m at a breaking point.  Weekends have been spent catching up on sleep and trying to work on projects that will propel me into the next phase of my life: starting up my photography website, researching small business start-ups, writing and submitting pieces and photos for publication, growing lavender on my property and making goods to sell at farmers markets some day.  The creative projects I’ve been dreaming up and working on have been simmering for a long time, but have come to a rapid, rolling boil as of late and I can’t help but wonder if the universe is repeating back to me one of my favorite quotes: Leap and the net will appear.

As you can imagine, there are a lot of crazy things going through my head: would I be crazy to leave a job I like (most of the time) for the unknown when so many people have no job (I could be doing a benevolent act by creating a job for someone else, I could argue)?  What about the money, from loss of income as well as capital required to start a new business venture (we’ve crunched numbers and have thankfully paid off our debts and could comfortably live on David’s nearly guaranteed government salary, but the capital would still need to be acquired)?  What about the loss of identity to having a jet-setting corporate career life (as much as I bitch about it, there is a sense of power and importance when in such a type of position, but at what cost – I’m never home, I never see my husband or dogs and life on the road is lonely and frustrating more often than not)? 

If my dreams are truly representative of a transition, then I should be relieved, because my dreams of pregnancy and birth (something that would normally make me panic in a concious world) express feelings of happiness, ease, and support by friends and family in my sleeping psyche.  I’ve known along that this transition was in the works, but I planned for it a couple years down the road.  Now I’m left to wonder if the time is now, if the messages are encouraging me to make said leap right now.  It’s exciting yet frightening all at once.  

There have been subtle messages I’ve been receiving that have signaled to me that a change is coming for me at work, so I think I might just wait it out and see what’s on the horizon.  When I was a doula, I used to encourage my moms, that although it would be downright painful to be patient at the end of their term, that they would be quite uncomfortable in their current situation and want the baby to arrive already, that they needed to find the courage to wait.  When baby is ready, I would tell them, he or she will let you know; trying to rush the baby before s/he was ready would surely spell complication during the birthing process and the transition would be hard not only on mom but baby as well.  So perhaps I need to follow my own advice and be patient for that pivitol moment but be ready to leap forward, without inhibition, with my new “baby.”